But what if?
Yes, you might have been misled here but you're hear now. You have to continue reading because I tend to go around in circles and some how end up in even more murky waters; metaphorically speaking. You have to try to decipher this mess and come out with some new information. You have to try to read between the lines. You have to pay your bills on time or your pets will rebel and re-arrange all your furniture while you are getting your bikini waxed.
Or do you?
Who waxes a bikini anyways? You thought I screwed up there didn't you? HA!
Look, I'm sorry you got spam and it lead here. The truth is you sort though that stuff every day. I do. It's crap. But think of all the fun we've had reading the subject lines!
"Buy Power Juice NOW! Increase Your Brain!"
"Tickle Your Realtor with New Home Loan Paper!"
"Increase the Size of Your Florida Part!"
"Hook up with Dirty Singles in your Neighborhood!"
"Get Arrested While Farting on Politicians!"
Spam has changed the way we think about Spam. Yeah, we used to get it in the ol' mailbox. You remember that thing that's at the end of the driveway? You don't? Never mind.
Well, regardless of how much we all hate spam like it Destiny's Step Child, we get it. We endure it. We trash it. It's part of life and now you've wasted some of yours reading this blog. I hope you enjoyed your time though. I don't do this to annoy anyone, I'm just a patsy. I didn't shoot the sheriff or the deputy but I am guilty of something. Something I've been reluctant to share with you all. Something I don't really talk about too much because I'm afraid it might scare all the lady's away.
I'm smoking hot.
Also: if I don't make it back to the keyboard in time, Happy Turkey Day.